A while back I wrote about how to get to know me: my strange loves. I was just thinking, what if that became a mini series, where you really could continue to get to know me. So this time I’m telling you about my strange quirks. I have a lot, but I’ve done my best to narrow it down to the weirdest ones. Some of these I even ask myself, “Allison, can you just cool it and be normal today?” And then I think, “Nah, better not!” 😉
1. I almost always start sentences with, “It’s funny because…” even though what may come out of my mouth next might not be funny. For example, I might be catching up with my boyfriend and start talking, “It’s funny because…Wait. No. It’s not funny. I was trying to tell you that blah blah got fired at work today. Not funny.” I have no idea why I start every story like this.
2. Whenever I eat food with my hands, like a burger, or a sandwich, I always refer to it as a committal meal because I cannot put it down while I’m eating it. I don’t know why, but I always have to eat the entire thing before I can move on to anything else, or take a sip of a drink. That’s why I have to cut things in half, so I can get a break.
3. I have to clean my apartment every night before I go to bed. I have to straighten up the couch, put the remotes away, organize the coasters, fluff all the cushions and throw pillows, put the blankets in their basket, put all dishes in the sink. But wait, now there’s dishes in the sink. Now I have to do all the dishes and get them out of the sink. If I don’t do all this, it literally hurts me. Like I can’t go to sleep because I know it’s not done. I can’t even leave the remote out of this little box that I have on the coffee table.
4. I cannot wear sandals unless my toenails are painted. If they’re chipped I feel like trailer trash, so I will wear closed toed shoes so that no one else has to suffer from that view. But my fingernails on the other hand…I can rock the chipped look for weeks. But don’t even think about showing those chipped toes in public!
5. After I get out of the shower and dry off, I immediately have to get a Q-tip and clean my ears. If I don’t have a Q-tip, I really don’t even feel completely clean – like the whole shower was a waste. The cleaning of the ears is like the cherry on top. It completes everything and pulls the whole cleanliness together.
6. Coasters. Use ’em people! Not trying to get the “used and aged” look on all my wood furniture. I have a collection of different kinds of coasters and it’s for a reason! They’re cute and helpful! I always go around picking up all of the boyfriend’s cans of soda and glasses of water and what not to make sure they are all on their respective coaster.
7. Whenever I see a dog or cat I get stupid excited. Like so stupid excited it’s pretty close to embarrassing. The other day I saw THE CUTEST Australian Shepherd puppy – 9 weeks old and THE FLUFFIEST little nugget ever. I was an old coworker’s new puppy and I went nuts. Like, “Oh my god! Oh hello little fluff nugget, you are just the cutest thing in the world, aren’t you?!” All in a baby talk voice of course. I was just so excited and baby talk (I usually call this my animal voice) was just flowing out of me. Like to the point where I was like, do I steal this dog and run as fast as I can to my car and never look back? Or to the point where I was like, I’m so excited I’m going to throw up all over you. Talk about a weirdo. Those poor animals never see it coming…
8. I cannot go to sleep unless my closet doors are closed. If my closet is open when I get into bed, I actually have to get up and close them. Maybe it has to do with the monsters in the closet idea? I don’t know, but if I wake up in the morning and they’re open from not closing the night before…it just freaks me out!
9. I can cry about pretty much everything. And I do. I’m sure most of you remember when I wrote about crying about everything, but it’s still true. And annoying. One of those weird quirks I suppose! But it’s really for laughter, happy, sad, angry, stressed, worried, overwhelmed, movies, songs, acts of kindness. Whatever it is, it gets me. I should have been an actress. That’s got to be more of a talent to be able to cry on cue so much!
10. I hate showering. I know, that’s weird and gross of me, but I hate it. I mean, obviously, as a functioning member of society, I shower on a regular basis. All I’m saying is that I would just much rather not. Mostly because of my hair. I have soooo much of it, that it takes forever to wash, dry, and style, that it almost just feels like more work. Thank god for the invention of the messy bun, am I right?!
Hope y’all enjoyed getting to know me a little better 🙂